INSIGHTAotearoa
A newsletter for New Zealand's insight meditation practitioners and communities
98 Riverside Road, Gisborne, 4010 Aotearoa New Zealand
deborah @ insightaotearoa.org | ISSN 1177-5076
APRIL 2009
IN THIS NEWSLETTER YOU'LL FIND...
1. EDITORIAL: RIGHT EFFORT
2. A Balanced Practice, A Balanced Life
3. Right Effort
4. Vajra Song
5. Like Fine-Tuning a Musical Instrument
6. Poem: Sunrise
7. Poem: Another Reason I Don’t Keep a Gun in the House
8. Readers Write
9. Questions ... questions ...
10. Sangha news
11. The Last Word: What Inspires and Motivates You?
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1. EDITORIAL: RIGHT EFFORT
This April edition of INSIGHTAotearoa focuses on right effort. It is interesting that Right Effort is grouped with mindfulness and concentration as mental aspects of the Noble Eightfold Path. The texts speak of right effort as preventing unskillful, unwholesome qualities and cultivating skillful, wholesome qualities. As a result there is greater calm and peace of mind that support mindfulness and concentration.
Kanya Stewart opens this edition with A Balanced Practice, A Balanced Life followed by Right Effort by Jack Kornfield. An assortment of poetry, sutta story, and Vajra song accent the theme of right effort. Please make note of the study on the effects of meditation in the “Notices” section 13. Francesca Fogarty is seeking participants for this study. Joseph Goldstein offers the last word discussing what inspires and motivates him.
May this edition of INSIGHTAotearoa offer some interest, inspiration and guidance for your practice and your life. May the words of the Buddha illuminate the path:
Just as treasures are uncovered from the earth, so virtue appears
from good deeds, and wisdom appears from a pure and peaceful
mind. To walk safely through the maze of human life, one needs
the light of wisdom and the guidance of virtue.
May You be peaceful and at ease,
Deborah White
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Energy (viriya), the mental factor behind right effort, can appear in either wholesome or unwholesome forms. The same factor fuels desire, aggression, violence, and ambition on the one hand, and generosity, self-discipline, kindness, concentration, and understanding on the other. The exertion involved in right effort is a wholesome form of energy, but it is something more specific, namely, the energy in wholesome states of consciousness directed to liberation from suffering. This last qualifying phrase is especially important. For wholesome energy to become a contributor to the path it has to be guided by right view and right intention, and to work in association with the other path factors. Otherwise, as the energy in ordinary wholesome states of mind, it merely engenders an accumulation of merit that ripens within the round of birth and death; it does not issue in liberation from the round.
-- Bikkhu Bodhi
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2. A BALANCED PRACTICE, A BALANCED LIFE
-- by Kanya Stewart
When I was growing up, Mum had a friend who lived over the road from us. Aunty Mary spent a lot of time knitting. In later years, as she knitted she used to pull on the garment to stretch it hoping it would grow quicker than if she left it to evolve naturally. This is the image that came to mind as I was reflecting on right effort. How often, in our hurry to get somewhere or achieve something, we try to manipulate and control conditions in an attempt to try to get there faster. Allowing a process to have its own natural unfolding seems to be something that is alien for us in the West. What we know well is trying to get the end result as quickly as possible. Rather than valuing the journey, the experience we have on the way, we value the outcome, the end result.
Applying right effort is like learning a whole new way of being. Learning to relax at the same time as applying ourselves. Learning to let go, to let be as we do what needs to be done so our practice can be balanced. Being able to move forward towards awakening at a pace that unfolds organically and allows us to integrate and absorb the teachings and express them through the way we live.
Wise reflection on how we are living is important aspect of integrating the teachings. Investigating what is of value, what supports the practice becomes part of the journey. We live in a world where distraction is more and more inevitable unless we make a very conscious commitment to swim against the tide. We may have responsibilities which include work, children, partner, cooking, cleaning, gardening, keeping up with family and friends. But we need to bring ourselves into the picture, to reflect on where we are being replenished and renewed. Can we love ourselves enough to take some time for a conscious walk in nature, perhaps to sit quietly under a tree if we need to relax, or spend time on the cushion each day, even if it’s not as long as we’d like it to be. Forty five minutes is great, thirty minutes is good. Less than that is just fine, if it means having some time in silence to draw our attention within and ground ourselves in the present moment. Getting caught up during the day, whether we have a busy life or a more leisurely one can mean most of our time being spent in moving towards (attachment) or away from (aversion), with very little time spent in just being present to what is unfolding. A leisurely life isn’t a prerequisite for having a steady daily formal practice, or noticing what is happening as it is happening. My experience is that the resistance to formal practice can be just as great when I don’t have a full day, and falling into unconsciousness can occur both within a busy daily schedule or when there is plenty of time available to slow down.
Whatever our circumstances, balanced effort can support us to remain mindful during our days, to keep us in touch with what’s important. Spending a little time when we wake up in the morning to reflect on impermanence (annica), change, and not-self can be enough to keep us connected during the day to the dharma and our intentions to see through delusion. Too little effort and we can lapse into laziness and lose that edge needed to be awake. Too much effort, and we can swing towards being too contrived, too tight in our approach, too attached to results. In formal practice, we can investigate our experience in the present moment noticing whether we experience ease or contraction; if we have a sense of balance or if we are being too alert and focused.
Thinking of effort in terms of energy is really helpful I find. Practice requires energy, obviously, and if we are exhausted from overwork, if we are trying to fit too much into our day, if we are not sleeping well, then there are going to be consequences. So what goes hand in hand with right effort is clear understanding, seeing with wisdom what is present in our body/mind in terms of energy or lack of energy, and then adjusting our practice accordingly rather than pushing ahead regardless. That may mean that in the morning, instead of leaping out of bed at 6 a.m. to do a half hour sit before beginning the day, it may be appropriate to sit in bed, or even lie in bed and do the practice that way. The Buddha taught the four positions of sitting, walking, standing or lying down as all being viable positions for practice. The drawback with the supine position is that it is easier to fall into drowsiness or sleep.
To be able to apply effort in a balanced way requires that we are grounded enough in our body that we can actually know what it feels like when our efforts are supporting our practice. The internal experience of balanced effort is very different from what it feels like to be trying too hard and being over zealous. The former brings a feeling of ease and spaciousness, the latter brings tension into the body and mind. If we are not inhabiting our body, if we have a habit of being much more in our head, we have the tendency to be critical and are not going to know what it feels like to be with what arises with any kind of acceptance or kindness. So the effort required here is to bring more mindfulness into the body, to pay more attention to what our body is reflecting back to us. Putting energy into Metta practice (loving kindness) will help to counteract the strong tendencies of the judging mind. Patterns of control are very common when we have become disconnected from our emotions and from contact with our body. When we keep ourselves on a tight leash, we will undoubtedly be making too much effort. Changing these habitual ways of being can only happen when we can bring awareness to the underlying pattern of control.
Our formal practice can teach us a lot about how we are in relationship to ourselves and others. For many years I had a habit of being harsh with myself, and the pattern continued until some measure of wise understanding began to grow as mindfulness became more integrated into my daily life, supporting me to make internal changes. I discovered that what was required of me was less effort and a lot of letting go and letting be. Previously there had been a lot of pushing and exerting myself. Internally with this new perspective and shift in approach I feel much more at ease, more spacious and certainly more gracious towards myself. I am less demanding with myself, less judgmental, more forgiving of mistakes I make. At the same time I am more accepting of others and their choices.
When we understand deeply how widespread the lack of kindness or appreciation we have for ourselves is in the West, we can see how crucial it is to explore what right effort means to us. When we don’t value ourselves, when our self-worth is low, then the potential for trying too hard is much greater. Striving to get somewhere is one of the habitual patterns we can fall into, whether it’s trying to escape who we perceive ourselves to be, trying to be approved of, trying too hard to be a good yogi.
When we are driven there is little wisdom in our actions and we suffer as a result. This is where enquiry can be so helpful, by looking into our motivation, where we are attached to results. When we get caught up in attachment, it’s hard to see the pattern and be able to let go of it. When we can see how destructive the pattern is by feeling the effects in our body/mind then the work in releasing, in letting go can begin. This is so hard for us. We have such a strong work ethic in the west, our self esteem is so intricately connected with what we do that even though we may know intellectually that it’s harmful to overwork, to ignore work/life balance, we can still keep on in the same old way. We don’t have many role models in our culture for living a life of balance. We don’t score brownie points for being more relaxed, or making sure we get enough leisure time so that our energy is renewed.
Living mindfully though is not about increasing our leisure time so much as bringing more consciousness into what we do, why we are doing it and how much effort we are using in the process. It does take a lot of effort to stay awake, to keep looking into where our attachments are keeping us bound up. Enquiry takes effort - observing our behaviour and interactions throughout the day, seeing where we are being skillful and being able to acknowledge where we may not be in alignment with our values. Staying alert and attentive to where our ego’s get inflated and where we are clinging on to fixed views or being attached to being right takes effort and commitment. Here right effort involves seeing clearly but also being forgiving of ourselves when we see our faults, when we feel we haven’t come up to scratch. Such observation can be painful, and applying skillful means to our evaluation is critical. Otherwise we risk falling back into old habit patterns of undermining ourselves, feeling not good enough and shaming ourselves.
What is right effort for one is not right effort for another. It is up to each of us to discover what works for us within the framework of the teachings and how we can most skillfully follow the guidelines. This is the way that we can practice authentically, not applying a standard set of rules but using our own wisdom and capacity to investigate what works for us personally. Having the support of a teacher who is able to gently guide us in the direction of right effort is invaluable. Fortunately, encouragement for a more gentle way of being that honors and reflects the need for more forgiveness and loving kindness towards ourselves is coming through from many of the teachers. Certainly this approach was an integral part of the teachings given by Sharda and Jeremy in the recent retreat at Te Moata
Right effort is required to bring ourselves to do the practice, whether on the cushion/chair or in daily life, requires the effort of remembering. Remembering the importance of practicing, remembering the freedom that comes when we practice and see clearly, remembering that the wanting mind that draws us into distraction is the deluded mind and can never bring us peace and happiness.
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3. RIGHT EFFORT
-- by Jack Kornfield
The next three steps of the Eightfold Path have to do more with inner work of meditation than outer work of Right Livelihood and Right Speech, and so forth. The next step is called Right Effort. It's very important in understanding spiritual practice. Ramana Maharshi, the great Indian master, one of the greatest ever, and certainly in the last century or so, said:
Enlightenment is not your birthright. Those who succeed do so only
through proper effort.
My teacher Achaan Chah said there are two basic ways of practice. One way of practice is to be comfortable. And it's valuable. You can sit a little and get yourself quiet. You keep the precepts, so you don't harm people, and they start to like you. You say "Om" at dinner. You chant a little before you eat. And everything becomes nicer in your life. It becomes more comfortable and more pleasant because you live a good life and you're peaceful. The other way to approach spiritual practice is not to be involved in trying to be comfortable, but rather to be free or liberated. And that way of practice has nothing whatsoever to do with comfort. Comfort may come and it may not. Sometimes it may be terribly uncomfortable, but its goal or its direction is not comfort; its goal is freedom. It's a wonderful thing, and it's a real legacy of the Buddha. Right Effort means we really need to start to pay attention, and to see how fortunate we are, and to begin to see the laws that govern the world within which we live. Another friend of mine just called me this week and said her husband who is in his mid-forties has advanced lung cancer; he just found out about it a few days earlier. Then she called about four days after that. She asked me what was the lesson in that. She said, "You're a teacher. Tell me what the lesson is." I don't know what the lesson is. I said, "I don't know. Call me later, maybe I can think of one." And she called back. If you trust people they generally find out what the lesson is anyway. She said, "I know what the lesson is." I said, "What?" And she said, "The lesson is to love people while you have them, when they're here." It was so sweet and so touching because it came from a place where she really, really knew it. It's to take care with what we have that's beautiful, and nourish it; and that which isn't, to abandon it.
I'll read you a passage from Nisargadatta Maharaj, the old bidi wallah who I studied with in Bombay; wonderful old teacher. He sold little Indian cigarettes on the street corner, and he was fully enlightened somehow at the same time. He had these classes. He died a couple of years ago. He was a wonderful old man. Someone asks: “What can truth or reality gain by all our practice? (He uses truth and love interchangeably)” He says:
Nothing whatsoever, of course. But it is in the nature of truth or love, cosmic consciousness, whatever you want to call it, to express itself, to affirm itself, to overcome difficulties. Once you've understood that the world is love in action, consciousness or love in action, you will look at it quite differently. But first your attitude to suffering must change. Suffering is primarily a call for attention, which itself is a movement of love. More than happiness, love wants growth, the widening and deepening of awareness and consciousness and being. Whatever prevents that becomes a cause of pain, and love does not shirk from pain.
That's an amazing thing to say, that love doesn't shirk from pain, that what loves wants is not pleasure. You live in Marin, you know about pleasure. It's wonderful, but it gets boring after awhile. It does! There is something deeper or higher, that's richer, that is our capacity, or our birthright, or our deepest need. I don't know what it is, but it is different than just pleasure. What does it mean to make Right Effort? We've touched this, or we want that, or we want to discover or open. There are two different approaches or styles to effort. I've practiced with them both, and I'll put them out, and you can listen and see which works better for you. One is the Rinzai approach, using Zen terminology, where there is enlightenment, and it's a goal, and you work very hard - you literally bust your ass on your cushion or whatever you do to get tosatori or kensho or enlightenment, and you really make an effort directed to this goal.
One of the ways of practice in the Theravada tradition that I'd done in the Sun Lun Monastery was to sit without moving a minimum of four sittings a day of two hours. The first hour was heavy breathing, where you sat and did as full and deep breathing as you were capable of for an hour. And the sayadaw was sort of like a football coach, and he would come around and say, "Harder, more." And you concentrate on it. You get very concentrated in an hour. If you were sleepy it woke you up; if you had thoughts it kind of blasted them out of your head; and by the end of an hour you were very present. Then the next hour you continued to sit without moving, and used that concentration just to be with what your experience was. It was very powerful. Or the kind of effort in the Mahasi Monastery where I practiced where you sit and walk l5 or l6 hours a day, or l8 if you can. You sleep for four hours and you eat a little bit. You sit motionless, you don't move, and the sittings are shorter, 45 minutes or an hour, and you don't make a movement without paying attention to it. Lift your hand, blink your eyes, "blinking, turning, moving." You pay attention to every single little thing. Why do that? It sounds so hard. It is, it is very, very hard. And if you start to do it, all the defilements, all the desires, all the fears, all the reasons that you keep yourself spaced out and in fantasy, and don't want to pay attention, they all come at once. Like this wall. And you just sit, and you just walk, and you do it. The purpose is to dissolve the sense of solidity of the world. If you pay attention that carefully, and that fully, or that deeply with concentration -- that's next week's talk on Right Concentration -- you begin to see that what's solid is not solid, and that what seems as "I" or "body and mind together" starts to dissolve into all these little parts. There are the four physical elements, the different mood states, and consciousness, hearing, seeing, smelling, and tasting. And that's all there is! And it takes the whole show apart, but it takes a powerful concentration and a sustained attention to do it. It really is going through fire. There's even a physical transformation. There's a book I read recently by Ireena Tweedy called "Chasm of Fire". She's this old Sufi lady who worked with this master in India. She talked about her experiences, more in the Kensho metaphor, but it's not so different. It's really sitting through the fire and letting your body, your desires, and your fears, just burn through you, and you just sit. After awhile your attachments to things change and you become much more detached from this that we take to be ourselves, this physical body. And you become more detached from the fears and feelings, and all of those things. You start with that detachment; then you see it as it operates, clearly, because you're not so incredibly identified with "I, me, mine, my body, my mind." It's very powerful! Suzaki-roshi teaches Zen sesshin in a very strict fashion. Or Chan Hsun Hua who runs Gold Mountain Temple. He used to have 49-day chant sesshins in San Francisco. You sit for 49 days, and you sleep sitting up, you sleep in your place. I never wanted to do it. I've thought about it. For some people it's terrible because they're already tight and they do it and it just drives them crazy, it makes them tighter; and it doesn't bring any enlightenment at all; it just brings pain. But for some people it's a way of practice, the effort to concentrate, the effort to pay attention, to bring yourself back -- again, and again, and again. It's not the effort of tensing your body, but it's the willingness to sit with anything, and keep bringing your mind back, or to walk with anything, to really do that. Gurdjieff says:
If a person gives way to all their desires, or panders to them, there will be no inner struggle in them, no friction, no fire. But if for the sake of attaining liberation, they struggle with their habits that hinder them, they'll create a fire which will gradually transform their inner world into a single whole.
That's one way of undertaking practice. And when you look at how powerful our habits are, and how much we go to sleep, and how much the world really needs somebody to have the courage to say "no" or "stop" or "wake up" or "live differently," it becomes very compelling. I know that you're not on retreat, that we live in busy household lives -- but the same spirit, this kind which is just half of the effort I'll talk about, can be brought to your daily life. It can be the effort to do whatever it happens to be in your life that you know is really going to make a difference. So one can bring that effort, and it's a wonderful thing to do. And if you learn to do it -- it takes practice - it's really empowering; it brings a certain inner strength with it as well.
The other approach to Right Effort is actually a bridge between these two that would be nice to read about. Someone recently gave me this book called ""Peace Pilgrim." It's about this woman who walked around the country for 20 years wearing her blue jogging suit that said "Peace Pilgrim" on it, carrying a toothbrush. She spoke about peace, that you had to make yourself peaceful and the world peaceful. She never took food unless it was offered to her. She fasted otherwise. And she never took rides until much later in her life. She just walked and talked about peace. And this is her story, and it's a fantastic book. She said:
During my earlier spiritual growth period -- The ten years that she was getting prepared to do her peace walk -- I desired to know and do God's will for me. Spiritual growth is not easily attained, you know, but it is well worth the effort. It takes time, just as any growth takes time. One should rejoice at small gains, and not be impatient, as impatience hampers growth. The path of gradual relinquishment of things hindering spiritual progress is a difficult path, but only when relinquishment is complete do the rewards really come fully. The path of quick relinquishment is an easy path, for it brings immediate blessings, and when God fills your life or the truth fills your life, the gifts overflow and bless all that you touch.
What she said is very beautiful. It takes time, just as any growth takes time, and it's not easily attained but well worth the effort. If you do a lot of it, you get a lot of reward; if you do it slowly, which most of us do, then it's a little more frustrating because a lot of the reward comes when you're much, much freer. It's the way it goes. What can you do? It's still worth it. It talks about both these kinds of effort, that if you're willing to make the effort to really do a lot, or let go of a lot, or transform your life, then tremendous fruits can come. You can change how you live this week, how you relate, or you can take it slower. The other kind of effort is not goal-oriented, to get to kensho, or satori, or enlightenment, or dissolve the world, transcend yourself; it's the Soto Zen approach. It's the approach that says that you're already enlightened. And that is enlightenment; it's not something else. It's just what's here. And the only thing that blocks our enlightenment is all these thoughts that say, "This isn't enough; I want it different." If you could just live with things as they are; that's all; this is it.
Krishnamurti speaks about it very beautifully when he said:
It's the truth which liberates and not your effort to be free.
"All year I'm going to get this, and be that, and now I'll be --" I remember when the first interesting meditation practice experiences started to come, I got very excited, and my mind started to fill with thoughts again. There were these lights and things, and I thought, "Gee, this is really exciting," because I started to think about what I'd do when I was enlightened, who I would go visit and what I would say. It's like that ego, that part of us that wants to take it as a kind of a merit badge or something that you can wear; or a degree. And it's not that at all. It's to live with things as they are, to see them clearly, directly, and truly in each moment.
Ramana Maharshi said:
There are two paths to awakening. One is that of self-inquiry, where you look to see.
The main koan is, "Who am I?" or " What am I?" And you do it through awareness; or through whatever training that you can, to discover and investigate the body and mind. And the other is the path of surrender, where you say, "Not my will but thine." It's actually the same if you really look at it. "Okay, in this moment I'll be aware of what's here without trying to change it and just see what it is." In that awareness you start to see the truth of it -- that it's impermanent -- that it's not "I, me, mine"; that it's not self; that we're not separate; then it begins to reveal its nature.
This way of effort then is the effort more of surrender, of letting go, rather than trying to attain something. It's surrender to be in each moment in a balanced way. Don Juan says:
If one is to succeed in anything, the success must come gently.
With a great deal of effort. But with no stress or obsession.
So it's rather the effort to be here again and again and again, and to truly see that things arise and that they pass away; that they're born; that they die; that we don't own anything; that none of it is ours. Our thoughts, do you control your thoughts? Does anybody here have control of their thoughts? We think that they're ours. Or our bodies. We do a little better at that, but not very well, if you look at it. There's something I want to read. I've been reading all these books on early child development and labor and whatever. It's from a book that I've come to appreciate very much called "Whole Child, Whole Parent." If anyone is looking for a spiritual guide to parenting, it's the best that I've found. It's called "Zen and the Art of Throwing a Ball." It gives a much more Taoist sense, instead of making the effort to come back again and again and dissolve the world. This is the way of effort which finds the Tao within our movement, the way that we live.
The self -- the self-centered sense of us -- knows that freedom has something to do with law and order but thinks that order must be brought about by will power. The child shows us that, on the contrary, freedom comes through subservience to existing order, to the Dharma, through conscious alignment with it. The self knows that freedom has something to do with pleasure, but it thinks it means feeling good and being above the law is what pleasure is. The child shows us that this pleasure is really spontaneity and that it too is a by-product of absolute compliance or obedience to the law or the dharma. Here's a story:
Once I heard a father marvel, "How did he learn to throw that ball so far? I didn't teach him. When did he learn to do this? I didn't even see him do it? Why did he do it? No one in our family is particularly interested in baseball, and yet he did." Everything that father thought might have been a hindrance. had it actually been present. The family's interest in baseball or someone watching him, or anything. Somewhere along the way, in the throwing of a ball, the child had conceived of a possibility of freedom. Perhaps it first came through watching someone else, perhaps once in flinging a ball, he had let it fly and surprised himself. At any rate, some freedom had been encountered and was now a possibility in his consciousness. After that, as long as he remained unself-conscious -- which means undivided -- he was able to give his undivided attention to the possibility of which he had conceived. Through his pure desire for freedom in the sense of possibility, certain laws were given the opportunity to gain power over the child. Aiming himself toward a conscious possibility he became subservient to it. And then through the child's receptive and devoted consciousness the underlying force of being, itself, organized and energized and utilized and coordinated everything in the child to express himself in the form of freedom to throw the ball so beautifully. He must have practiced for hours on end, expending tremendous effort but little strain because his interest in seeing what was possible carried him along, confident that what he could conceive of was possible and could be realized if he went at it. Sometimes the ball fell short but he did not infer that he lacked power. Sometimes the ball went wild, but he did not infer that the thing was impossible or that there was no predictability and all was chaotic. Whatever seemed too hard only showed him that he had not yet discovered the knack. Whatever appeared chaotic only suggested that the order and his oneness with it had not yet been discerned. Sometimes his shoulder hurt, but the very hurt became a guide, directing him into better alignment with the hidden force he did not doubt. He looked at everything for what is and what isn't, and everything taught him, until he could throw the ball far, fast, accurately and with remarkable ease. And he wasn't proud. He wasn't too pleased, and he didn't feel triumphant. He felt grateful. And he didn't feel powerful, he felt surer. And he felt free and was freer. It was never that he had his way with the ball, rather through his undistracted, absolutely focused, unselfconscious attention, the invisible laws of physics had their way with him. through the total submission of himself to the invisible laws, he found both dominion and spontaneity which he rightfully experienced as true freedom and joy.
What a wonderful way to learn. It speaks to this other meaning of effort, and it also speaks to a kind of secret about the first kind of effort, which I've used a lot in practice, and gained from in some ways. And that is, in the end you have to let go. No matter how much effort you make and where it takes you, it doesn't take you all the way, because it's not your effort that makes you free but your discovery of what's true about yourself, and life, and its changing nature and the laws of it; that you come into harmony with it, that you become free. It can be big things. It can be a big satori and a big awakening. Sometimes you get hit over the head by someone near you getting cancer or a near car accident, or it can be little things, like a child, where you just begin to take your life as a discovery, and you start to see what are the laws that operate that make people happy, make them unhappy, what are the laws that operate that make war and make harmony or peace between people. I got a letter recently from someone who had been in one of these classes asking about the question of enlightenment. We talk so much about precepts and following them, and Right Speech and Right Action, what about enlightenment, where does it fit, or is this just a system of ethical conduct? Is this Buddhism? The Buddha said it quite explicitly a number of times in one very beautiful sutra. He said:
The reason for my teaching is not for merit or good deeds or good karma, or concentration, or rapture, or bliss, or even insight. None of these is the reason that I teach, but the sure heart's release. This and this alone is the reason for the teaching of a Buddha.
All the other things are secondary to it, secondary to what that child experienced with the ball or what the old bidi wallah talked about of the movement of love. It's not compelled by pleasure, not by precepts, not by success or failure, but by learning to grow, learning to open, learning the laws of the world, learning to connect. There is enlightenment, there is freedom, it's true, it's absolutely true; and you can experience it; you can come to that. It says in the Dhammapada that:
To live one day and taste very deeply the meaning of impermanence
is better than living l00 years and not to touch it.
Why could that be so? Because to taste that, even for a moment, is that you see what's true about life and you start to live out of that truth more fully. You become free, which is what we all want most deeply. . I ask you a few questions. Think about Right Effort for a moment. Where are you making too much effort in your life? What things do you do where it's too tight and too hard? You need to learn balance. Can you think of them? Where do you try too hard or grasp too much? Where do you make too little effort in your life? Where are you lazy or habitual? What aspects of your life could be ennobled or awakened with more effort? Think about them. Which ones? Where is your life too internal? Where do you shy away out of fear from the world of events and circumstances around you? Where is your life too external, or you don't sit enough, you don't take enough silence? You don't listen inside to your heart, to what you care about, make it inform your life. To listen in this way inside is to discover the laws like throwing the ball of Right Effort in your life. Where do you miss the mark? Practice a little more. What takes more effort, what takes a little less? What takes more solitude? What takes more giving, and loving, and serving? You actually know the answers to those things. They come pretty easily to us. We just forget to ask, or we don't want to ask because it means, "Ugh, I have to rearrange my life yet again in some fashion or other." But it doesn't really matter, because that's the game. Everything gets rearranged anyway. Either you can rearrange it or you can wait for it to be rearranged. It's also the game; to grow. So you can stall it for awhile. If you really drag your feet, you can; but it's not as interesting. I'll close with my question to my teacher Achaan Chaa. “I still have very many thoughts, my mind wanders a lot, even though I'm trying to be mindful.”
He said:
Don't worry about this, try to keep your mind in the present. Whatever there is that arises in the mind or the heart, just watch it, let go of it.
Don't even wish to be rid of thought, then the mind will reach a natural state, no discriminating between good and bad, hot and cold, fast and slow, no "me" and no "you", no self at all, just what there is. When you walk, no need to do anything special, simply walk and see what there is. No need to go to a cave or cling to isolation. Wherever you are, know yourself by being natural and watching. If doubts arise, watch them come and go. It's very simple. Hold on to nothing. It's as though you're walking down a road, periodically you run into obstacles. When you meet difficulties, see them and overcome them by letting go. Don't think about the obstacles you've passed already, don't worry about the ones you haven't seen yet. Stay in the present. Don't worry about the length of the road or a destination either. Everything is changing. Whatever you pass, do not cling to it, and eventually the mind will reach its natural balance where practice becomes automatic and effort becomes effortless. All things will come and go of themselves. Sitting hours on end is not necessary. Some people think that the longer you sit the wiser you must be. I've seen chickens sit on their nests for days on end. Wisdom comes from being mindful in all postures. Your practice should begin as you awaken in the morning and continue until you fall asleep. What is important is only that you keep aware, whether you're working or sitting or going to the bathroom. Each person has their own natural pace. Some of you will die at age fifty, some at age sixty-five, and some at age ninety. Don't think or worry about this. Try to be mindful and let things take their natural course. Then your mind will become quieter and quieter in any surroundings, like a still forest pool. All kinds of wonderful, rare animals will come and drink at the pool. You will see clearly the nature of all things in the world. Many wonderful strange things come and go, but you will be still. This is the happiness of the Buddha.
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Can you accept the moments of anger and fear as guests, be willing to receive them with kindness without feeling obliged to serve them a five-course meal?
-- Christina Feldman
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4. VAJRA SONG
Happiness cannot be found in great effort and willpower
but is already there, in relaxation & letting go.
Don't strain yourself, there is nothing to do.
Whatever arises in the mind has no importance at all
because it has no reality whatsoever.
Don't become attached to it.
Don't pass judgement.
Let the game happen on its own, springing up & falling back
without changing anything
and all will vanish & reappear, without end.
Only your searching for happiness prevents us from seeing it.
It is like a rainbow which you run after without ever catching it.
Although it does not exist
it has always been there & accompanies you every instant.
Don't believe in the reality of good & bad experiences
They are like rainbows.
Wanting to grasp the ungraspable, you exhaust yourself in vain.
As soon as you relax the grasping, space is there,
open, inviting, comfortable.
So make us of it. All is yours already.
Don't search any further.
Don't go into the inextricable jungle looking for the elephant
who is already quietly at home.
Nothing to do
Nothing to force
Nothing to want,
and everything happens by itself.
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5. LIKE FINE-TUNING A MUSICAL INSTRUMENT
As Ven Sona was meditating in seclusion [after doing walking meditation until the skin of his soles was split & bleeding], this train of thought arose in his awareness: "Of the Blessed One's disciples who have aroused their persistence, I am one, but my mind is not released from the effluents through lack of clinging/sustenance. Now, my family has enough wealth that it would be possible to enjoy wealth & make merit. What if I were to disavow the training, return to the lower life, enjoy wealth, & make merit?"
Then the Blessed One, as soon as he perceived with his awareness the train of thought in Ven. Sona's awareness — as a strong man might stretch out his bent arm or bend his outstretched arm — disappeared from Vulture Peak Mountain, appeared in the Cool Wood right in front of Ven. Sona, and sat down on a prepared seat. Ven. Sona, after bowing down to the Blessed One, sat to one side. As he was sitting there, the Blessed One said to him, "Just now, as you were meditating in seclusion, didn't this train of thought appear to your awareness: 'Of the Blessed One's disciples who have aroused their persistence, I am one, but my mind is not released from the effluents... What if I were to disavow the training, return to the lower life, enjoy wealth, & make merit?'"
"Yes, lord."
"Now what do you think, Sona. Before, when you were a house-dweller, were you skilled at playing the vina?"
"Yes, lord."
"And what do you think: when the strings of your vina were too taut, was your vina in tune & playable?"
"No, lord."
"And what do you think: when the strings of your vina were too loose, was your vina in tune & playable?"
"No, lord."
"And what do you think: when the strings of your vina were neither too taut nor too loose, but tuned (lit: 'established') to be right on pitch, was your vina in tune & playable?"
"Yes, lord."
"In the same way, Sona, over-aroused persistence leads to restlessness, overly slack persistence leads to laziness. Thus you should determine the right pitch for your persistence, attune ('penetrate,' 'ferret out') the pitch of the [five] faculties [to that], and there pick up your theme."
"Yes, lord," Ven. Sona answered the Blessed One. Then, having given this exhortation to Ven. Sona, the Blessed One — as a strong man might stretch out his bent arm or bend his outstretched arm — disappeared from the Cool Wood and appeared on Vulture Peak Mountain.
So after that, Ven. Sona determined the right pitch for his persistence, attuned the pitch of the [five] faculties [to that], and there picked up his theme. Dwelling alone, secluded, heedful, ardent, & resolute, he in no long time reached & remained in the supreme goal of the holy life for which clansmen rightly go forth from home into homelessness, knowing & realizing it for himself in the here & now. He knew: "Birth is ended, the holy life fulfilled, the task done. There is nothing further for the sake of this world." And thus Ven. Sona became another one of the arahants.
AN 6.55
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Drink your tea slowly and reverently, as if it is the axis on which the world earth revolves - slowly, evenly, without rushing toward the future. Live the actual moment. Only this moment is life.
-- Thich Nhat Hanh
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6. POEM: Sunrise
-- by Mary Oliver
You can
die for it--
an idea,
or the world. People
have done so,
brilliantly,
letting
their small bodies be bound
to the stake,
creating
an unforgettable
fury of light. But
this morning,
climbing the familiar hills
in the familiar
fabric of dawn, I thought
of China,
and India
and Europe, and I thought
how the sun
blazes
for everyone just
so joyfully
as it rises
under the lashes
of my own eyes, and I thought
I am so many!
What is my name?
What is the name
of the deep breath I would take
over and over
for all of us? Call it
whatever you want, it is
happiness, it is another one
of the ways to enter
fire.
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7. POEM: Another Reason I Don’t Keep a Gun in the House
-- by Billy Collins
The neighbors' dog will not stop barking.
He is barking the same high, rhythmic bark
that he barks every time they leave the house.
They must switch him on on their way out.
The neighbors' dog will not stop barking.
I close all the windows in the house
and put on a Beethoven symphony full blast
but I can still hear him muffled under the music,
barking, barking, barking,
and now I can see him sitting in the orchestra,
his head raised confidently as if Beethoven
had included a part for barking dog.
When the record finally ends he is still barking,
sitting there in the oboe section barking,
his eyes fixed on the conductor who is
entreating him with his baton
while the other musicians listen in respectful
silence to the famous barking dog solo,
that endless coda that first established
Beethoven as an innovative genius.
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We learn and grow and are transformed not so much by what we do but by why and how we do it.
-- Sharon Salzberg
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8. READERS WRITE
I am a Trustee of the Tauhara Centre in Taupo, and one of my responsibilities is looking after our Centre's Library.
I just want to pass on how much I appreciate your organisation's Insight Aotearoa newsletters, so full of wonderful articles and writings. I make a point of printing each one off and placing it on display in our Library for the many people who come through our Centre to read, enjoy and be inspired.
May the insight continue to flow!
Best wishes,
Nasir Grace
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9. QUESTIONS ... QUESTIONS ...
Do you have a question about your practice or about Buddhism in general? Send it in, and we will put it before a teacher. If it can be answered easily, it will be in a future INSIGHTAotearoa. Send your question to deborah @ insightaotearoa.org or by post to Newsletter, 98 Riverside Road, Gisborne 4010.
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10. SANGHA NEWS
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Mindfulness in Plain English can now be downloaded:
http://www.urbandharma.org/udharma4/mpe.htm
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11. THE LAST WORD: What inspires and motivates you?
The extraordinary nature of the mind itself. The Buddha said it can be our worst enemy or greatest friend. We see that although we often live in confined corners of habituated thought and emotion, there is the real possibility of freedom. As we ask ourselves how we can find appropriate responses to the uncertainty and confusion of these times, I find inspiration in understanding that peace in the world begins with peace in our own minds. Wise and compassionate action in the world arises from wisdom and compassion within ourselves.
-- Joseph Goldstein
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With Metta,
Deborah White, Kanya Stewart, and Peter Fernando